What does the Bible say about divorce and remarriage?
God wants each marriage to be happy, peaceful, and a blessing. His original plan for marriage, established in Genesis 2:23–24, did not include divorce. Instead, the two became “one flesh.” This is God’s will for marriages today, and it would have continued—in a sinless environment.
But because of Adam’s choice, sin entered the human race. As a result, every marriage now unites two sinful people, and the consequences of sin must be dealt with by both husbands and wives.
The worst consequences of sin in marriage included polygamy (first seen in Genesis 4:23), abuse of the weaker partner (including physical, sexual, and emotional abuse, as well as abuse of power), sexual unfaithfulness (uncontrolled lust leading to fornication, prostitution, or adultery) and abandoning the marriage (now regulated through divorce). Each of these can have traumatic effects on a spouse—and especially on the wife.
But God desires to protect people from these consequences. To protect wives from the escalating damage of sin in marriages, He gave rules to govern divorce in Deuteronomy 24:1–4. Instead of placing God’s seal of approval on divorce, these rules set boundaries to prevent lives from being completely crushed by sin.
Jesus affirmed God did not require divorce when He responded to a question:
“The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?’ And He answered and said to them, ‘Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning “made them male and female,” and said, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh”? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.’ They said to Him, ‘Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?’ He said to them, ‘Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.’ His disciples said to Him, ‘If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry.’” Matthew 19:3–10 (emphasis supplied).
God’s instructions for divorce in Deuteronomy put limits on it to protect women who were vulnerable, but His instructions came to be interpreted as permission to divorce for any reason, so the wife’s safety and security was always in jeopardy. Jesus corrected that misunderstanding, teaching that divorce is not a command of God, but that partners should pursue reconciliation. Thisseemed like a new concept and was hard to accept—even for Jesus’ disciples. The point is that divorce is not God’s desire for marriage. Malachi 2:16 affirms that God hates divorce, but He does not forbid it.
In Matthew 5:32 and again in Matthew 19:9, Jesus acknowledges only one reason for divorce—marital unfaithfulness, the breaking of the seventh commandment.
The Bible does allow for separation in cases of abandonment, when an unbelieving spouse departs from the marriage. “But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace” (1 Corinthians 7:15). This text does not permit divorce when someone leaves a marriage for reasons other than marital unfaithfulness, but it does not require continued cohabitation that would lead to conflict.
What about cases of abuse? The Bible doesn’t address marital abuse directly, but the unity God desires for marriage inEphesians 5:22–33 is obliterated whenever it is present. Abuse does not fit within a godly marriage, and no one should perpetuate that abuse by remaining in the situation. Following the Bible’s instructions, separation is advised, since God does not want any person to remain with an abuser, regardless of who the abuser is—parent, child, spouse, caretaker, or someone else. God desires us to have peace (1 Corinthians 7:15). The abused person needs to find a place of safety, notify law enforcement, get support, and pray about it.
God loves the abuser, and can change their heart; but returning to that relationship should only happen when conversion has been demonstrated through time, has been confirmed by many witnesses, and after intensive counseling with a Christian counselor trained to handle these situations.
What about remarriage?Jesus addresses this topic clearly. If you have committed adultery (marital unfaithfulness), remarriage is not permitted by God. However, out of mercy to the innocent party, God does permit remarriage when your spouse has been unfaithful, and your marriage has not been reconciled.
“So He said to them, ‘Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.’” Mark 10:11–12
“Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced from her husband commits adultery.” Luke 16:18
If there is no marital unfaithfulness, God sees the married couple as married, even if they divorce by the rules of man. If a person remarries apart from the conditions stipulated by God, they have committed adultery in God’s eyes.
If a spouse has been unfaithful, God prefers for us to forgive and reconcile, if that is possible, because that is what He does for us. Marriage can be repaired after trust is broken, but only with time and continual effort. This reflects what God promises is possible for our relationship with Him when we sin.
God has followed these rules Himself. When Israel was unfaithful to Him, God put her away through a certificate of divorce. “Then I saw that for all the causes for which backsliding Israel had committed adultery, I had put her away and given her a certificate of divorce …” (Jeremiah 3:8). But in His mercy, God also restored the relationship, when Israel was willing. “I will betroth you to Me forever; yes, I will betroth you to Me in righteousness and justice, in lovingkindness and mercy; I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness, and you shall know the Lord” (Hosea 2:19–20).
There is good news for anyone who has been through divorce. The simple truth that God loves you has not changed. “God is love,” and “love never fails” (1 John 4:8, 1 Corinthians 13:8). You can’t change the past, but God has a plan for your life as you move forward. You are not excluded from God’s family or from the privilege of serving Him in the way He calls you. God has a way of using our experiences to open opportunities to communicate His love to others who are going through what we have already experienced. God understands the pain each person has experienced, and He wants to bring healing and lasting joy in your life. He invites us each to recommit our ways to Him.
How can you protect your marriage against divorce? Seek God first. Study and put into practice the principles of godly living. Let God lead you to the right person and the right time to be married.