How should we handle anger, bitterness, or resentment?
The Bible is God’s Holy Word, a guide to help us through any circumstance we encounter in life—including anger. Bitterness is a form of anger or resentment, and although it is not always easy to see it, there is a definite connection.
The first step in dealing with this problem is to admit that we are angry, or in this case, bitter. It is perfectly okay to be honest with God. We shouldn’t attempt to hide our genuine feelings from Him. Look at what the Bible says about this very necessary step:
“And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account.” Hebrews 4:13
“‘Be angry, and do not sin’: do not let the sun go down on your wrath.” Ephesians 4:26
Next, we need to make a genuine attempt to determine why we are bitter. If we have any doubt that the Bible was designed to deal with our problems today, consider what the Lord asked Cain:
“Why are you angry? And why has your countenance fallen?” Genesis 4:6
It’s very important to not let our emotions control us, so carefully read the following advice:
“He who is slow to wrath has great understanding, but he who is impulsive exalts folly.” Proverbs 14:29
“He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.” Proverbs 16:32
“Do not hasten in your spirit to be angry, for anger rests in the bosom of fools.” Ecclesiastes 7:9
Now bear in mind that when we speak angry words, those words only stir up anger in the other person. Many times we see others respond to us in the same manner we have responded to them. It’s time to give our anger and bitterness to God, and here’s the advice the Bible gives us:
“Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him; do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass. Cease from anger, and forsake wrath; do not fret—it only causes harm.” Psalm 37:7–8
“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Proverbs 15:1
We must allow God to lead us into the process of forgiving those we feel have wronged us. It may not be easy, but God can help us through the process. Reflect on these words:
“Bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do.” Colossians 3:13
“And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32
“And forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who is indebted to us. And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.” Luke 11:4
Now comes a step that we may not have thought about: accepting that God has forgiven us for being bitter. Often, we ask for His forgiveness, then find it hard to believe that He actually has forgiven us. But the Bible says:
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9
Anger, bitterness, and resentment are strong forces that hold many of us back from a rich spiritual walk, so it’s imperative to not allow these to build up in our hearts. We must deal quickly with any matter that causes anger to well up in us. We must not delay when we need to ask someone’s forgiveness, either. Again, the Bible gives us relevant advice:
“‘Be angry, and do not sin’: do not let the sun go down on your wrath.” Ephesians 4:26
Remember that nothing is impossible with God. He loves you with an everlasting love. Why not allow Him to take this burden away from you?